Talking things through

by - February 23, 2020

Fantasy graphic of a dolphin coming out of a water bottle with stars in the background


It is so easy to bottle everything up and not share something. Because it can be so much easier to answer I'm fine when asked how you are doing rather than actually explain why you might not feel so good.  I've been there and I am sure others have too - where you don't want to explain how you feel because opening up can be scary and you are not quite sure how people will take it. However, if there is something I have learnt from life, it is that sharing how you feel and your problems is so important and if this can encourage or help one person open up then I'll be happy. Below I try and tackle the obstacles that can make you feel nervous about talking to others when life is a little difficult and the reasons why you can still share how you feel and why it is so essential.

It is scary to open up

It can be scary to open up to someone and tell them your feelings and yes there is the possibility that someone will misunderstand you. BUT, there are people that will understand or at least put in the work to understand and be willing to help you through it. After you share how you feel with the right person, it gets easier. They say a problem shared is a problem halved. Talking about the situation may not immediately solve the issue, but it helps you feel less alone and lonely. Sometimes we don't even need someone to do anything, all we need is someone to listen- to validate that the way we feel is OK. Talking to others can add perspective to whatever is worrying you and stop you spiralling. 

"Dumping" your problems on someone else

One of the main reasons I sometimes find it hard to open up when things get hard is that I don't want to feel like I am dumping my problems on someone. However, that is what relationships are - reciprocal- you help each other out. The exact same way you have been there for others when they are going through a hard time, you also deserve to share when things are not so good in your life. Don't feel bad for sharing with someone when life isn't going quite to plan. You deserve the love you give out to others. 

You are not ready

Maybe you are not ready to share everything. That is OK. Everyone starts somewhere - what is important is that you do begin to share even if you can't quite get everything out. Beginning to share where it is going wrong can stop it getting worse in the long run. It also gives someone something to work with to help you out. Believe me, you are not too "difficult" or "complicated" for someone else. 

No one cares 

I know that sometimes if no one checks up on you it can feel like no one really cares and you can feel lonely. People do care- it is is just not everyone remembers to check up on others. Someone cares about you and how you feel. If you reach out to others, someone will be there to help you out - it just may not necessarily be the first person you tell. Not everyone is a real friend or someone you can rely on, but there are people that will be there and those are the ones that count- forget the rest. The problem is that not a lot of people are observant so many will not realise you need them unless you say so.

Opening up can be scary. There is real strength in being vulnerable with someone. It is OK to struggle, but you don't have to do it alone. 💙

Help keep me going 🙂

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2 Comments

  1. This is a really helpful, positive and encouraging post, thank you for sharing! You are so right, opening up to others can make us feel so much better, as we feel understood, listened to and less alone. I think we all have times when we need to know someone cares, especially when life gets stressful and overwhelming. Thank you for sharing your thoughts, hope you have a lovely week! <3 xx

    Bexa | www.hellobexa.com

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    1. Yes- it is amazing just how much of a difference someone knowing when you're struggling can have. Thank you so much for taking the time to comment. I hope you also have a lovely week! :) 💛

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