I am one of those people that typically tends to want to sort things out myself. I think it can be good to try and find your way out of your own issues- or at least be proactive in solving your own problems. But, this doesn't and should not mean that you have to always do this by yourself. I can recognise that when it comes to my personal life, I don't like asking for help as I find it difficult to reach out. This is something I am still working on, but am hoping I can change. I hope that this blog post serves as a reminder that it is OK and healthy to ask for help, regardless of how big or small you think it might be.
I have written about friendships, and being okay by yourself, but realise I have never touched being single and happy. Over the last year, I’ve thought a fair amount about being single. Something about moving to university with the pressure and expectation that I am meant to find the love of my life at this point in my life has me thinking a lot about relationships.
I have found this year and generally this academic year difficult for multiple reasons- a lot in my life changed quite quickly and I was forced to adapt to changes (some not so nice or ideal in a short space of time). As a result, I have been reflecting more on what being strong means to me. I think it can generally be quite easy to have this idea that being strong means never feeling weak, or never feeling like a mess and always feeling like you have everything under control. This year more than ever has taught me that is definitely not the case (or at least that is not the way I interpret it). I want to talk about in this post how this year has redefined my idea of what I feel strength is.
I used to see growing up as just getting older- little (and by little I mean when I was a child) me did not see it as anything else. It was just the excitement of being able to do more. Now as an older individual, I see that growing up is so much more than getting older: it is change; in your identity, in your life, discovering new things. Sometimes it is pain in order to learn. It is getting lost and finding your way again.
I think there’s a real tendency in society to put things off until we feel ‘ready’ or until there’s a better moment. I was recently thinking about moments I’ve really enjoyed or something I was proud of myself for and found that in most of these cases I didn’t feel as ‘ready’ as I thought I would, but I went ahead and did it anyway. That either allowed for self-growth or just for spontaneous moments that make life fun.
Finding my own voice and realising what I stand for was something that took me a while and I think is always an ongoing process. Writing this blog in many ways has helped me find my voice and has given me a platform to share things that are important to me. Learning to utilise it and discovering what I believed in has been one of the biggest things in boosting my confidence and self-esteem, which at one point in my life was very low. Hopefully, this can help someone on their journey to discover their own voice.
Being in isolation is definitely challenging - as a person who sees myself as an ambivert (both an introvert and extrovert) not being able to surround myself with people, especially friends has not been something I have found easy. But, being at home more and the world having pretty much stopped has given me more time to think - to reflect, to pause. Here are some of the thoughts and things I would say I have learnt.
I guess this is a little late considering we’re already halfway through February. I’ve never done a month in review. But, January was a difficult month for me and so I wanted to document some of the things I’ve learnt this month, as it is when you go through difficult moments that you learn and you grow as a person. These are things I can hopefully take forward for the rest of this year.
Being present and able to take things in is so valuable. But, in a world with social media and technology, it has become so easy to be there physically, but not mentally. Below are some things I like to do to ground myself a little and make sure I’m living a real life- to make sure I am 'living in the moment'.
I recently turned 19 (in December) and I just wanted to document a little on how it feels or at least part of the journey on growing older. This is a little reflection on what I have learnt over the years and this will of course inevitably grow as I get older.
I usually always do a post at the end of the year. But this year, I wanted to do 2. Not just one on what I learnt in 2019, but also a general reflection and year in review. I say this every single year, but I truly have no idea how 2019 has somehow come to an end. Here's some general thoughts on what I make of my experience of 2019.
So somehow 2019 is almost over and I am back writing one of these posts again. I really like looking back on my previous posts just to see how I have grown and the different things I learn each year. You can read my 2017 post here and my 2018 post here. So here are some of things I learnt in 2019 (top 5). I feel like the ones this year are a lot more about what I have learnt about myself rather than life lessons.
I would say I am a people person and I do love spending time with my friends and family. However, one of the areas I think I have most grown and definitely grown partly in this year is enjoying my own company and being okay with being by myself. I don’t need to be surrounded by somebody every second of the day.
This came to mind recently when I was thinking of the fact that I have done things that my younger self would be terrified to do. I think it is important to challenge yourself, but equally not overstretch yourself so much to the point that you are putting yourself in a situation you are completely uncomfortable in and unready for.
We all experience change - it is inevitable and happens and will continue to happen. It's not something I find easy if I'm honest. But, I don't think anyone does. When struggling with change, I used to beat myself up about it thinking that other people were better at it. Or that I just wasn't the best with it. Here is the thing, there is no magic formula to it and everyone struggles with it. No one is 'good at change'. There are some people who adapt to it more quickly, but everyone goes through a period of adjustment.
