Helping others going through a difficult time

by - April 05, 2020

Salmon pink graphic with hearts, dots and line patterns.

Helping others and looking after yourself can be a very fine balance. It can be very easy to get caught up in someone else's battle so much that you neglect how you feel and forget that it has become part of your own. So I'm writing this based on my own experience hoping it might help someone else. Of course, this depends on just how much the person you are helping is struggling and can vary depending on the seriousness of the situation.

1) Pause. Acknowledge how you feel and take some time to yourself. Allow yourself to process what is happening. It can be really easy to get caught up in everything and just keep going. You carry on offering help without realising the effects it is having on you- getting stuck in a cycle where you are constantly putting other people's needs above your own. Going down that road for too long can mean that you no longer feel alright. Remember to take a breather- self-care and mental health is so important and you can't help someone else if you don't look after yourself - you can't pour from an empty cup. 

2) It is OK for you to feel down. When you are helping someone else going through a hard time it is so easy to put pressure on yourself to be "strong" all the time. To the point where you are not allowing yourself to feel sad or overwhelmed. It is OK to crack and show vulnerability in front of the person you are trying to help. If anything it can be a connecting point and just shows that you are human.

3) Make sure you have someone that you are talking things through with. If the person you are helping is really struggling, you may not be able to get support from them for the way you feel. But, it is still important that you are getting some sort of help to manage your own wellbeing - whether that be friends or relatives. You also need to be able to open up, express how you feel and relieve the stress and that can come from looking after someone else. You deserve to receive the love you give out to others too.

4) Remember that what you are doing is amazing. Sometimes it may seem like your help isn't enough (depending on the situation the person you are helping is in). You doing your best is always enough and all that can be expected. You taking the time to support someone in a difficult situation is incredible.

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  1. This is really useful! Thanks for these tips!

    1. No problem - hope you find them helpful. :)

  2. Thank you! I know this kind of situation can be difficult so I wanted to help out anyone else that may be in similar circumstances.


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